Ephesians 5 - Submission

When Allan and I were getting ready to get married, we talked a lot about the meaning of the traditional vows. We decided to say our vows without the pastor leading us (I admit I did have to use a cheat sheet - public speaking nerves were not any less then). We discussed our views on "headship", which we both admitted we didn't really understand, and we didn't really resolve any thoughts on that. And we worked through surname importance, with Allan suggesting he take on my surname, but in the end just each keeping our own (my family loss playing a large role in that decision for me). Over the years we've driven the gravelly road of what possibly could be the biblical definitions of "submission" and "headship" and how that is supposed to play out in our western culture and 2000s time. Which brings me to some thoughts on Ephesians chapters 5 and 6. Just some thoughts right now (September 2022) - don't hold me to these in years to come as God continues to make himself known better to me as well....

In my ESV Bible, Ephesians 5:1-20 is titled "Walk in Love". This title comes from the "introductory" sentences of that chapter, but the first word of that section is "therefore", and we all know when we see a "therefore", we need to find out what it's there for .... So, back it up to chapter 4, where Paul is talking about living in unity in the body of Christ - a unity of faith that gives us a deeper knowledge of the Son of God. And then he leads into how this new experience of being united with Christ causes us to live in a way that blesses others as Christ's united body, ending with "be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you". So now (chapter 5:1-20) we walk in love, as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us - and the section ends with "submitting to one another out of reverence for Christ". 

Just like we had to read vs 1-20 in light of what came before, we now also need to read vs 22-6:9 in light of what came before it. Paul exhorts the Ephesians to submit to one another out of reverence for Christ, and then breaks it down, to show what that looks like. 

        Everyone: SUBMIT to one another out of reverence for Christ
            Wives: SUBMIT
            Husbands: SUBMIT (using an alternative word - LOVE)
            Children: SUBMIT (OBEY)
            Fathers/Parents: SUBMIT (DON'T PROVOKE)
            Slaves: SUBMIT (OBEY)
            Masters: SUBMIT (DO THE SAME TO THEM)

There's something really helpful about chapters, paragraphs and subheadings etc. in our Bibles, because our western eyes and brains have trouble with big chunks and run-on sentences etc. But let me tell you a secret someone told me before: Shhh - the chapters, paragraphs and subheadings are not part of the original Bible. Why does knowing that matter? Because if we understand that, we don't need to be bound by them. Sometimes chapters, paragraphs and subheadings make us forget that we need to look back and forth for context (thank goodness for "therefores" that remind us to check what they're there for...). Paul didn't write chapter 5: 22-33 especially for wives and husbands, as the subheading in the ESV suggests. He wasn't trying to say - wives and husbands, if there's nothing else in this letter you have time for, then at least read this.... He wrote a letter, to a church. He told the church to submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. And then he gave examples of how people should live into that submission. He showed how everyone could submit to everyone. Wives to husbands, husbands to wives, children to parents, parents to children (what??), slaves to masters, and even masters to slaves (wait-what??). I actually think he started out with wives, because it was an easy one to swallow, and the men (and probably most women) listening would start gravely nodding their heads, yep...yep. Then, a little jolt of discomfort to the men (and a little twinkle of light for the women), as he starts to talk to the husbands... but OK, they'll work through that. Then back to submission by kids, yep...yep (kids slink down in their seats). Then a bigger jolt - parents, you need to submit to your kids too, you know (hang on, maybe submission is a bit more complicated than we thought it was - and note: the kids suddenly sit up a little higher and look a little more like they feel valued), and then ending off (after reminding slaves to submit to their masters) by saying even masters need to submit to their slaves.... (side note: do you see how the value of each part of the body is also played out here, as we think through the emotions of the people listening to these examples???)

So what is submission in the letter to the Ephesians about? Being imitators of God, as his beloved children. Walking in love, as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us. No filthiness, no darkness - walk as children of the light. Walk as wise people. Be filled with the Spirit, addressing one another with psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing and making melody to the Lord with your heart, giving thanks always and for everything to God the Father in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ. All of us, to each of us, knowing that he who is both their Master and yours is in heaven, and that there is no partiality with him.

Is it going to be easy? No. And that's why we keep reading Paul's letter and he encourages us with the promise of God's strength in us. This is not just a fight between people submitting to each other or not, or people liking the idea of submission or not. This struggle is just the start. Take on God's strength to help with this struggle, because there are bigger fights you need to be readied for - cosmic stuff. Take up the whole armour of God, so that you will be able to stand firm when it gets to that. And know that the initial work you've put into this unity stuff (submission to each other and all that) is worth it, because we're going to need to stand united when the evil day comes....